The Twelve Days of the Spirited Woman: Vicki Lickorish

Thursday, December 8th, 2011 in Stories

This 12-part blog series, exclusively for Mamalode, highlights the Every Woman Visionary. Each of these women are featured in the first-ever Spirited Woman 2012 Directory: Resources For An Inspired Life! (www.thespiritedwoman.com). Set to launch on 12/12/11, the FREE magazine-style digital directory – rich with inspirational stories, resources and more – is our gift to you. We’re hosting a 12-day countdown to the directory launch at www.facebook.com/thespiritedwoman. We invite you to come on over and to share your art, quotes, stories, and videos in celebration!

Name(s): Hi, I’m Vicki Lickorish…yes, it’s my real name! I married into it 4 years ago, tell you what, it creates some great giggles, and it sure is memorable!

So what do I do, I am the founder of Combined Energies, an empowerment coach, a motivational speaker, an intuitive life guide, an empath, a soul healer, a storyteller, a wife a mother, a loVer, an author, a blogger and generally an all round good egg, even if I do say so myself…well, if you can’t blow your own trumpet every once in a while!

How did I come to be doing the work I do?
Well, it’s a bit of a story! I’ve always been a people person, right from being a child I’ve always wanted to help people in whatever way I could. I can remember thinking it over and over when I was younger and decided that I could help the most people in the most situations by becoming a mounted police woman. It would be the perfect career; I could help and still share my love horses in my working life too!

I was so deeply disappointed when I was refused by the police force due to my height; I’m 5ft 4” two inches to short. After my rants and raves I calmed myself and make my mind up that if the police wouldn’t have me I peruse my career with horses and ran a very successful stables.
Now life tends to throws us lots of curved balls, the first of mine was when I fell in love…oh did it change the dynamics of things.

I met my soul mate and nothing was going to stop us, I gave up the horses and we started a whole new life together, we married and worked hard together to build up a thriving business and everything was going so well, we were almost complete.

Curve ball number two, I had an ectopic pregnancy and if that wasn’t a hard enough blow, I was then told I was infertile, hard pill to swallow and another blow to myself esteem, not only was I too small to follow my chosen career, I was infertile.

I did sort of wallow in my own self-pity for a while, then through myself back into work so I could put my focus else were. It worked for a while, but nothing could stop my deep thoughts and feeling around wanting a baby so much.

IVF was the only way, and after our first attempt, I was pregnant, we were so excited, and when we found out we were expecting triples, we were overjoyed, an instant family!

Curve ball number three, after a having a scare I was rushed to hospital, after a scan, was asked how many are you having…you could have knocked me over with a feather when I was told there were four in there…yes quads!

Curve ball number four at 28 weeks, my body made its mind up that it was ready to have those babies, they didn’t want to wait another two days for the steroid injections to boost their little lungs. Our son, and three beautiful baby girls were born, we cherished our few hours together before they fell asleep in our arms.

Now being the person that I am, I didn’t want to wait too long before trying again, after 5 months, IVF attempt number two!

It worked again, although we were excited, there was a still a lot of nervousness, it was confirmed, pregnant…this time twins!

Curve ball number five came 18 weeks into my pregnancy, I lost one twin. I knew I had to stay strong and positive; now although we were so pleased we still had one baby, it was a very worrying time.

The whole team of doctors and midwifes where all so supportive through the pregnancy. My doctor decided the best course of action was to admit me into hospital to ‘keep a close eye on things’.

At 33 weeks enough was enough, I was having a few problems and it was time this child was born.
On Tuesday 19th March 1996 our son arrived safely into the world weighing in at a whooping 7lb 7ozs. We were complete. It was just so perfect.

A year past and things were just not right, we didn’t know why, but something was just not right.
I had to go back to hospital and was told that my insides where that messed up I needed to have a hysterectomy.

My husband was feeling rather odd, and then bang, curve ball number six!

Just after our son turned one and we found out that my soul mate, my son’s daddy, my lover, and my best friend had cancer, it was in operable and very aggressive.

Boy did I feel so angry, how could this be happening, why us, hadn’t we had our fair share of curved balls.

Those 18months of spending every single moment together as a family is something that I will treasure forever.

On 3rd August 1998, my soul mate, my rock and the father of our very precious son left this earthly plain. I hit a low, why me, why does all the shit have to happen to me, what had I done to deserve all this? 10 months later, I had the call to say I really HAD TO go in for my hysterectomy.

There I was, on first anniversary of my husband’s passing, aged 31, widowed, a single parent, and feeling totally inadequate as a woman.

Something had to change before I cracked completely!

I made my mind up, no more curve balls for me, time for a new start.

I moved away and started a new life for me and my boy, it wasn’t easy to leave all my friends and family behind, I just knew it was best for me and my boy. It was time for a huge shake up and some big decisions.

I was in a position that most people just couldn’t even comprehend, I’m sure some people thought I’d made most of it up…after all, this is usually the stuff films are made of, right!

I started to study; I wanted to be able to understand all the psychological factors behind all the emotions I had felt, I wanted to able to help others to be able to move forward in their life’s, just like I had!

Yes I’ve had my far share of ups and downs but I as I moved deeper into my own understanding of life I realized that my want and my passion to help people was stronger than ever.

So yes…with life as my teacher and my inspiration, here I am today working with people around the world helping them work through their own lifetimes issues, to let go of the past and to really move forward in their life’s…I guess I’m the person I wanted around and never had when I went through all my shit!

My family…hee-hee a right bunch of allsorts, all kinda sweet though!!

I met my now husband 7 years ago, I was working lunchtimes as a barmaid in my local village pub, and in walked Lee, it was one of those very rare moments that I was lost for words, I went all weak at the knees and felt like a teenager again!

I served him his pint, doing my best to keep it all together and that point hoped he wasn’t a talker, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to string a sentence together! I was saved, we had a bit of a rush so by the time I’d served everyone, had a chat with them all, Lee had finished his pint and had to leave.

The whole pub had noticed, I have to tell you, imagine the old style village pubs you see in the movies, I often likened it to the one in the movie An American Werewolf In London when they walk in off the Moors…that pretty much sums it up, a stranger, Lee, and they ALL notice!

It took me a while to get used to it, you see I’m a Northerner, I came from a small town just outside of Liverpool, so moving the 120 miles down the road to Warwickshire made me a foreigner…don’t forget how small the UK is! To lots, 120 miles is such a long way! Anyway I’m waffling!

“He’ll be back…you see” rang out from around the regulars, oh another little insight here, the average age would be about 70!

Now it’s a village and everyone knows everyone, so once they knew he was Lickorish oh boy did I get the low down…lives in the village, widowed and remarried, 1st wife died of cancer, 2 kids boy and a girl and going through a divorce…blimey…so much in common…I was smitten!

Two days later he came back, and that was it, within a week we’d moved into together, 3 years later we became Mr and Mrs Lee and Vicki Lickorish and here we are today one big happy family!

So Between us we have 2 boys, Jake aged 20, Morgan (my son) aged 15, Kirsty aged 17 and Tyler, her son (our grandson) who is 16 months old.

Jake has moved away from home, the rest of us are all together.

We’ve had our ups and downs, it’s been hard for the kids, they’ve had to deal with the loss of a parent as well as messy breaks up not to mention the ‘normal’ teenage years, but we’ve done it, we’ve pulled through as a family and we life live to the full…we all know it’s far too short not too.

What are your passions in life?
I’d have to say, life it self, is my passion; it’s always been my lifelong passion to be able help people in whatever way I can! After all that has happened in my life, I can truly say, hand on my heart, without any bull or fluffy polish!

I feel it is my soul purpose in this lifetime to help and guide people throughout the trials and tribulations of their life’s, we all have them, and we all know who good it has someone to help who understands from a place of empathy not sympathy!

If there is one thing I’ve learned through my life, it’s this, never plan to far ahead.
Life is far too short to set unrealistic goals and strive so hard to reach them.
Life is supposed to fun and it is meant to flow.
Every day is a new start and a new learning day.
When we change our way of thinking, when we allow our passion to lead the way, wow…we find our wings and we SOAR.
Following our passion in life really is so good for the soul!

If you’ve read down this far, told you it was a bit of a story!
I’d firstly like to thank you for doing so and secondly I like to say to you if I can turn my life around and be who I am today, anyone can!
Go for it girls…honestly, it is so worth it.
Now I’m not going to say it’s easy, it’s not, it doesn’t happen overnight that’s for sure!
Empower yourself, let go of your self-limiting believes have faith in yourself and your abilities, follow your passion and to say to the world…’hey here I am’
Don’t let anyone talk you out, especially yourself, that ego can be a buggar! And don’t let the doubters (they will be some!) plant seeds in your plans, keep on following your instinct and go for it!
I would also say, ask for help.
Seriously, this is something us women tend not to do, I’ve been there, done that and got plenty of tee-shirts for not asking I can tell you!
Know and trust it is ok at ask for help, you will be surprised at the support network that is out there when you start looking!
Remember, this journey is all about you and working on you first, when you do, you’ll find that your dreams and passions take you right where you want to go, and you will flow quite naturally when you are being you true authentic self! ☺

loads of loVe…Vicki Lickorish

Empowerment Coach, Motivational Speaker, and Intuitive Life Guide

vickilickorish@yahoo.com
www.combinedenergies.co.uk
www.facebook.com/combinedenergies
www.facebook.com/sharedwithloVe